pieces

I’m going to kill myself, it’s too much to bear
On my tenth pill, I think I’m almost there.
The house is empty. They left me all alone.
He cheated. Then told me over the phone
Ripped out my heart and tore it into pieces
So I gave it him back to iron out the creases
Or so I thought. I really am naïve
Pulled out another trick from under his sleeve.

Forget the warnings, I want the fantasy
Smile at day to cry at night – reality is tragedy
Tears wont stop flowing, I’m sick of asking why
Every single step has been a lie, after lie.
No. Not him. I lied to myself.
Blindfolded and stumbling, turning down the help.
When I fall its no surprise that I can’t get up
Open my eyes? It’s much easier just to bluff.

I made sure he knew, on the third pill or two
Hope he feels guilty, heart skips a beat or two.
Phone constantly ringing, my friends seem to care
Don’t pick up, they’re never really there.
I think it’s time to end it. Pull out a knife.
Before I had a chance. Now I don’t even have a life.

That should be the end. But really it’s not.
I couldn’t go through with it. Full stop.

?

I wanted to give a picture of what some young people go through during their teenage years. I quote City of Men “When you’re 15 you think everythings going to last forever. But it doesnt. There aren’t any good things that last forever, but there aren’t any bad things that never end.”